A few weeks ago I wrote about changing into a 2.0 version of myself and I thought I’d give a little update on the progress, since I honestly believe it can be so beneficial for ANYONE who seeks change within themselves, to become better, stronger, and to find growth.
Recently I decided to start reading again for leisure, as part of my new regime in this growth period. Ironically enough, I picked up a book called “Mindset” written by psychologist Carol S. Dweck, where she touches on the two different mindsets that exists — a fixed mindset and growth mindset. While I have yet to finish this book, I have gained quite some interesting insight on these two mindsets and I am glad that I was already in the progress of change and growth before picking up this book. The reason I say that is because it allowed me to be even more open minded while reading each chapter, rather than having a bias opinion throughout the process.
As I began my journey in growth and change a few weeks ago, I immediately understood that it was not going to be a change in personality or innate characteristics that can hardly be fixed. Because of that, I soon realized that it was my MINDSET that needed to change. And with a new mindset, my actions and goals would follow appropriately. Looking back on the person I was before, I can easily admit that I had a fixed mindset, as Dr. Dweck would define it. I never allowed myself to admit fault in the wrong things I did, because I was always seeking perfection and some sort of validation that I was confident, strong, and that there was nothing wrong with what I did. In similar cases, most girls at this age (18-24) often seek validation and confirmation as well, through the use of multiple guys in one period, showing off excessively via social media, while still expecting to find prince charming with a six-figure salary, European car, expensive dates, and of course, a big title to brag about. And no, I am not saying that every girl in that age range is like that, but I was simply just giving an example of how girls seek validation in other methods to boost their self-esteem and external look. At that point, each girl finds value and validation in themselves based on the people they are surrounded by — the “better” the people they are with, it automatically makes them feel better and more validated, whether it is the type of guys they date, friends they have, and etc.
Before taking the initiative to change, I never truly believed that it was simply my mindset that was holding me back. I did not realize that allowing other people’s opinion to affect my beliefs was due to my mindset not being strong enough. In fact, I simply did not have one that I was set on; hence, giving others the ability to sway my thoughts and actions. Taking these past few weeks to seek growth and change within myself has not been that easy, however, observing my progress has given me the strength I need and to realize how far I’ve come, is all it takes to keep going.
It’s easy to become distracted during the year due to school, work, constantly meeting new people, that we allow ourselves to evolve into a person we never thought we would become due to excessive change and an unstable mindset. Summer provides freedom for us to choose what we want to do with our lives during the short few months and often times, it is better to work on change and growth, than to follow the crowd.
“Change is never easy, but it provides the shift in mindset necessary for growth.”